Since I’m a good actor I will pretend that you are

SHOOT LOUD, LOUDER…I DON’T UNDERSTAND—-duck, duck quickly…when you realize how lousy this movie is. At 25, magazine model/starlet Raquel Welch was blasted into the bigtime in 1966 with hits Fantastic Voyage and One Million Years B.C.  Sandwiched between the two fantasies, the eye-popping but otherwise inanimate fantasy gal was snuggled into another nonsense escapade, made in Italy, produced by shrewd producer/destroyer Joseph E. Levine, never at a loss to peddle publicized flesh. The swinging 60s title, Levine sputtered “was thought up…on the spot…This is an age of titles.”  Maybe he meant something other than titles.

The dubbed Welch (about as convincing as her English would have been) was worked into the 100-minute crime-comedy-fantasy with Marcello Mastroianni, but even his lucky charm of Sophia Loren couldn’t have salvaged this merda pizza.

Directed by Eduardo De Filippo, who co-stars with Guido Alberti and Leopoldo Trieste, and co-wrote the script from his play. Writing ammo he had, evidenced by his bulls-eyes Marriage Italian Style and Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow, but this shot missed the target by a kilometer. Shrill noise. Raquel shows up to show off portions of the Welchian anatomy and pad the Levine waistline. Sources indicate it cost $2,000,000 to produce. Harder to calculate is what it cost to digest.